Climate Change: New Evidence

In this era of science and technology, there are still those that ignore or twist the facts — the undeniable evidence — that atmospheric CO2 levels have risen significantly in the last 50 years. Along with CO2 levels, the gas responsible for an increase in global temperatures, the accumulation of carbon particulates continues to accelerate, especailly in urban areas along both coasts of the United States and, to lesser extent, in the midwestern cities of Chicago, Milwaukee, Minneapolis.

The recent launch of the new high-tech National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) satellite has given climatologists a new tool in pinpointing the source(s) of climate altering particulates and gases.

“The evidence is so good, that those who deny climate change and/or contribute to it, should be jailed,” stated Dr. Nil Bye, climatology expert for NOAA. “We have seen a significant and alarming increase since the Trump election. It’s measurable and, I don’t know about you, but I already feel warmer!”

Aided by the new NOAA satellite, Dr. Bye has narrowed down the source that has created the infamous “hockey stick” on climate change graphs.

As evidence, Dr. Bye produced the following chart:

us-flag-burning-co2-rise

“No doubt about it. Clear as day. It’s like denying the Earth is round!” said Nil Bye. “Our planet is accumulating global warming gases at an unprecedented rate because of flag burning. That’s right. Flag burning. This should be taught in schools throughout the United States, but flag burning proponents — I call them “deniers” — have the funds to fight and the main-stream media on their side!”

Nil Bye continued: “The flag burning industry works very hard to maintain their status quo — they even hired some of the very same people — the actual people — from the cigarette days to teach these people how to ignite flags!” Dr. Bye was referring to the flag burners’ increasing skill at torching a flag (or multiple flags) and keeping it (them) burning. “Somehow, we need to cut off their supply of flags or switch to cleaner burning flags.”

According to Dr. Bye, who, unlike Bill Nye the Science Guy, holds an earned doctorate degree in climatology, if flag burning continues, the future of the nation and of the world looks bleak.

In an attempt to be fair and balanced, we reached out to Mr. Bill Nye, to get his take on flag burning and rising carbon levels, but, at the time of this report, we have received no response.

climate-spokesman-nill-bye-flag-burning-co2

Climatologist Dr. Nil Bye: Flag burning deniers should be jailed.

“We may be facing famine, wars — without a strong United States of America, the world will increasingly become more unstable and more dangerous. We may not be able to reverse the damage caused by flag burning, but we may be able to stop it from increasing.”

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BJU Dumps Unusual Films

First of all, this is not a blog about the food found in the Bob Jones University Dining Common during the late 1970s and 1980s. Yes, the Dining Common did stand without apology as they served many a film — unusual in character, yes, but at the same time possessing a strange and wonderful beauty…

What was that rainbow colored stuff on the sliced ham, anyway?

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Exposed film can label

After 66 years of existence, BJU has decided they no longer need their film production unit, Unusual Films, opting to farm out future promo work to an off campus “LLC”…

“Going forward, the University will produce films using an LLC model where films are externally funded and staffed as required. In fact, we are currently seeking funding for a major film project.”¹

And, what about those poor Cinema majors who were already facing an uphill battle just trying to make a living…

“The Cinema major remains a key program in our academic offerings, and we intend to further strengthen the program.”

Cinema remains a “key program” and we intend to “strengthen” the Cinema program —

By shutting down Unusual Films…

Three floors containing a large soundstage, editing theaters, classroom, offices, storage, a machine shop, wood shop and animation studio. Just seems to me if you’re going to “strengthen” the Cinema program, the last thing you should do is eliminate the perfect place in which to teach cinema.

Many who have commented on Facebook regarding this closing have the mistaken view that “cinema” means “film” and film is dead. So, BJU has wisely chosen to rid itself of an obsolete film production unit. Truly film is dead, but teaching cinema, animation, set-building, prop-building, sound and picture editing has nothing to do with film. These are necessary skills no matter what the motion picture medium be it analog or digital. The exact same principles apply.

It was the founder and director of Unusual Films, Dr. Katherine Stenholm, who said (I am paraphrasing) that the principles of directing — the principles of the art itself — exist, are constant, and are necessary no matter what the medium. It’s up to the director, or in this case, the cinema student to adapt.

In other words, editing may not require you to use tape and a splicer any longer, but screen direction, scene timing and rhythm, leading the eyes of the viewer, none of that changes. Same goes for shooting, lighting and sound. The Five “C’s”² — camera angle, continuity, composition, close-ups and cutting — still hold true!

Now, I realize that Unusual Films had a “mission” element to it. Like preaching and teaching, using motion pictures was just another way for BJU to draw men and women to Christ. That was intended to be the primary force behind the motion pictures produced. Secondary was promotional material for the University and a base for teaching film making to aspiring cinema majors. I get that. What I don’t understand is in a world where producing a film/video has become almost ubiquitous (and cheaper), why would BJU turn its back on one of the best ways to promote their beliefs?

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Animation camera moves pre-planned & charted out one film frame at a time…

The talent is there — or should I say was there.³ So, a few of them would have to learn computers, code and using digital cameras. Big deal. Many Cinema majors who graduated pre-digital (like me) have had to do the same thing. We learned. Why? Because Dr. Stenholm taught us that the equipment, the technology, does not matter — what’s in your heart, soul and mind does.

I have no way of doing so, but if I could, I would ask BJU to reconsider closing Unusual Films. Rather than give up and hand it off to some faceless, nameless “LLC” — why not adapt?

Be an example of what Dr. Stenholm taught us.

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¹quotes taken from a BJU email sent out to some (not all) alumni

²taken from Joseph V. Mascelli’s book The Five C’s of Cinematography: Motion Picture Filming Techniques — used to be required reading for every upper level cinema major.

³referring to rumors that some Unusual Films personnel would not be moving to the reorganized “Marketing Communications” department, but would instead be terminated.

President Trump: Who’s to Blame?

President (elect) Donald J. Trump. A New York billionaire who has never run for office and never held elected office. Mr. Trump ran against polished politicians (with the exception Ben “Dr. Sleepy” Carson) and won not only his party’s nomination (not their love), but the nation’s highest elected office — all in one shot.

Huge.

So, who’s to blame? Depends on whom you ask…

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Hillary Clinton — After Mrs. Clinton sobered up and showed up to thank her disillusioned and delusional staff, she blamed the FBI, James Comey and the media. Wait — the media? The media was With Her…!

Sanders Blames Clinton CBS DeFace the Nation

Bernie Sanders — Screwed out of the Democrat nomination for President, Bernie “The Bern” Sanders understandably blames Hillary, a weak candidate who assumed she had more support than she actually did. Bernie is right.

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Van “The Emperor” Jones — Playing off of the word “backlash,” Jones has referred to the Trump election as “whitelash,” (that Yale education kicking in there) implying that white people have had enough of blacks and other racial minorities. Thing is, the stats don’t back Jones up. In 2016, more Democrats (traditionally the party of African-Americans) stayed home rather than voted. Trump could not have won were it not for the help of Democrats of all races. In fact, Trump received a greater percentage of the black vote than Romney did in 2012. (Romney = 6% and Trump = 18.5%)

coastal-lefties-blame-everyone-else

Coastal Lefties, Liberal Urbanites — The above map says it all. Coastal and Urban Lefties see The Middle and (especially) the South as a hotbed of ignorance. Thing is, most of us in The Middle and The South would love to dump the Northeast, the West Coast, Minnesota and Chicago (not all of my home state of Illinois; see map below*.) Note that since this map was created, Michigan, Wisconsin and Pennsylvania all went Trump. Virginia went for Clinton.)

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Bill Clinton — Blames The Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy, Rush Limbaugh, Linda Tripp, Ken Starr, advances in forensics and DNA analysis — Can they get fingerprints off of skin? “I did not have sex…” Sure, Uncle Bill. Sure.+

bill-nye-blames-climate-change-creationism

Bill Nye the Science Guy — Speaking of Bills, Bill Nye “the Science Guy,” blames Trump’s election on climate change (a.k.a., “Global Warming”) and the fact that Biblical creation is still “a thing.”

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Heaven’s Gate Cult Leader Dude — Blames Trump’s ascendency on the still circling remnants of the comet Hale-Bopp. (Don’t stare too long into his eyes, okay?)

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Camille K. Lewis — Blames Bob Jones University.

Of course she does.

It should be pointed out that BJU overwhelmingly supported other candidates more conservative than Donald Trump — Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio, Rick Santorum. During the GOP nominating period, Trump was totally absent at BJU and, unlike many other GOP hopefuls, Trump never spoke at The Fortress of Faith, but did, however, speak at Liberty University and received much vocal support from Jerry Falwell, Jr.

It should be pointed out that Liberty University is where ‘Boz’ Tchividjian (founder of “G.R.A.C.E.” and guru behind The G.R.A.C.E. Report) teaches law. So, if any religious university is responsible for Trump, it would be Liberty — not Bob Jones University.

Like all of her “research” and uninformed pontificating about religion, politics and/or history, Camille K. Lewis is assuming, misleading, inaccurate, hypocritical and just plain wrong…

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*Yes, Illinois went blue, but look at the vote by county. Get rid of Chicago (please!) and you are looking at another Trump win.

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+Bill Clinton did have an impact on this election. Post-election stats tell us that more white women voted for Donald Trump than Hillary Clinton.

Trump’s Win Causes Rapture Delay

The signs were there.

We were already to go.

Hillary Clinton would be elected as President and the United States would continue its slide toward irrelevance — an old, former power, an immoral welfare state, collapsing in on itself. Which is, of course, why the United States is never mentioned in prophecy…

And Israel, without whom there would be no Christianity, has been a recognized nation since May of 1948, and will celebrate its 70th anniversary as such in 2018 — or should I say, the 70th week

It was perfect! All signs point to “transported I rise, to meet Him in clouds of the sky!”

But — no.

Thanks to Franklin Graham, Jerry Falwell, Jr. and a several thousand “prayer warriors,” God Almighty decided to allow the election of Donald Trump and put off The Rapture until the next Democrat is elected to the White House.

DATELINE: Asheville, NC — On November 9th, the day following Donald J. Trump’s election, during their morning devotions, both Evangelist Franklin Graham and Liberty University president Jerry Falwell, Jr. found tiny engraved stone tablets in their personal Bibles between the pages of the book of I Samuel chapter 7 and I Samuel* chapter 8. The stone tablets were identical and were engraved with the words:

Be careful what you pray for.
No Rapture for you!
Four years!

“It’s an obvious prank,” Falwell, Jr. said. “Got to be students here at Liberty. Besides, would God mimic ‘The Soup Nazi’ on Seinfeld?”

Graham also expressed doubts that the tablets were of Divine origin.

franklin-graham-2016

“The Seinfeld reference doesn’t bother me,” Graham said, “Mr. Seinfeld is Jewish, so that only makes sense. But, would God use a sans-serif font? I don’t think so.” (The stone tablets were engraved in “Arial Bold.”) Graham then added, “When I said ‘God showed up at this election,’ this is not what I meant.”

In related news, radio talk show host Glenn Beck remains secluded in his End of the World underground bunker (with a 25 year supply of freeze-dried food), but did release a statement that said all “family-loving, family-centered believers” should remain in place because the aforementioned tablets “were obviously fake” and did not apply to Mormons because they were “not gold and they were written in English, not reformed Egyptian.”

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*now pronounced “One Samuel,” since Trump’s election – see this blog for details

Living in Realville

Sometimes, I hate Realville. There are occasions that tempt me to try the aforementioned drug (see last blog) just to try to escape Realville, if only for a few moments. But Realville is one of those towns from a horror movie where, no matter how long or far you drive, you can’t leave. You always end up seeing that sign that says: “Welcome to REALVILLE!”

So, here we go.

Sick of politics? Yep. Me, too. Hate it. But let me give it one last shot before we all hurl.

Unless aliens invade or the Hale-Bopp People were right, Hillary Rodham Clinton will be the next President of the United States — the first female President and the first First Lady to hold the office. It disappoints me to say that, but that’s what we’re looking at. Yes, I will still vote for Donald J. Trump on November 8, and Florida may “turn red” (go Republican) but, on the dark, mean streets of Realville, I hear the rustle of a Presidential pantsuit, as well as, the issuance of a Presidential pardon.

But at the same time here in Realville, I hear that America is still great. That, like the great philosopher Gloria Gaynor said, “I will survive” and this too shall pass. And America will still be great.

Among his other problems, Donald Trump has an Electoral Vote problem. He needs 270 to win. Right now, as I write this (November 3, 2016 at 10:30 PM CDT), Trump can count on 116 with another 76 leaning Trump = 192. Not enough.

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On the other hand, Hillary has 182 solid votes with 101 tilting in her favor = 283. She’s already 13 over what is required to win.

Of course there are still 63 electoral votes that are considered “toss ups” or unknowns. Even if Trump gets all of the toss ups, he would still only have 255 — short of a clear win by 15 votes. Clearly Trump will have to snag a few “leaning Democrat” states away from Clinton, keep all of his “solid Republican” states AND get all of the “toss ups.”¹

Sure — it could happen…

The wind is picking up here in Realville. Cold front coming through, they say.²

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¹If neither Trump nor Clinton get more than 270, then the McMuffin Stra-tee-gery would be initiated. But, only if McMuffin can win Utah’s 6 electoral votes.

²Unless something extraordinary happens, this is the last post before Election Day. Go vote!

UPDATED: Monday, Nov. 07, 2016, mid-day

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Wasted Voting & Voting Wasted

It is unfortunate, but I saw the following photo accompanied by a caption that said something like, in all my years of voting, this is the very first time I put a political bumper sticker on my car — credit Clinton and Trump for that…

wasted-vote-mcmullin

Evan McMullin (hereafter known as McMuffin) is a third/fourth/fifth party U.S. Presidential candidate sanctioned and endorsed by Republican NeoCons (hereafter known as NeverTrumpers) in hopes that the Mormon McMuffin can win Mormon Utah and its 6 electoral votes. If that happens, and at the end of the national election on November 8th neither Clinton nor Trump can garner 270 electoral votes necessary for victory, that occurrence would throw the election into the current Republican controlled House of Representatives where, again it is hoped, the Elites of the GOP would agree with NeverTrump, probably not Hillary and go with an unknown…

McMuffin – with his 6 Utah votes.

That’s it. That’s the entire McMuffin stra-tee-gery.

mcmullin-strateegery

Voting for McMuffin is a waste of a vote.

You are not “voting your conscience” — “Vote Your Conscience” — just some nice words so when you touch the screen for McMuffin (assuming he’s on your state’s ballot) you will feel good about it. At least McMuffin hasn’t said “pussy” on camera or exposed America’s secrets to the world… Ah, yes — Feel The Good and vote McMuffin.

Truth of the matter is, those who vote McMuffin, those that want to vote their “conscience,” are more likely to get Hillary Clinton elected. Clinton, the crooked pathological liar, exposer of classified material, protector of partial-birth abortions and guarantor of a liberal U.S. Supreme Court — that’s what you are making possible when you vote McMuffin. If that’s what “voting your conscience” means to you, I suggest you skip a step and just vote directly for Clinton. You are doing that anyway.

A vote for McMuffin is another way of saying “I’m With Her.”

The whole “vote your conscience” shtick is geared at conservative, religious folks. In fact, the above photo originates in South Carolina where Latter Day Saint Evan McMuffin appears on the ballot. South Carolina, home of my alma mater, Bob Jones University, is decidedly conservative, Republican and Christian.

I have to take a step back for a moment and ask: Why? Why do Christians feel that voting for a Mormon is voting their conscience? The Book of Mormon is an obvious fake — a 19th Century book written in the language of the 16th Century (glomming on to the KJV Bible) by a polygamist con-man who talked to angels and saw Jesus in The Wild, Wild West. Come on. But, support for Mormon McMuffin is not unprecedented in South Carolina or even at good ol’ BJU. Dr. Bob Jones III, Chancellor of BJU openly supported Mitt Romney in 2012 and in 2008. The Pope was referred to as “the archpriest of Satan,” but sacred underwear gets a pass, at least at Bob Jones University. Go figure.

So, don’t tell me you are above the fray and you’re voting your conscience.

A vote for McMuffin is a vote for Her.

The only difference is one is LDS, the other, I would have to be on LSD to vote for…

hillary-spaced-out

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Related Blogs: No Illusions, Feigned Outrage, Jones & Trump: Commonalities Revisited, Glenn Beck: A Case for Idiocy, A Familiar Ring

My Ballot, My Vote

…assuming it’s counted. Counting is one reason I don’t vote early or absentee. Too many chances for a vote or votes to “disappear” when they’re just sitting around somewhere, waiting on Election Day.

Besides, I enjoy emerging from my hovel on Election Day and going to my local polling place to vote. Seeing all of the poll workers. Showing them my ID – yes, they actually check my signature to see if it matches. Receiving my ballot and off to an unoccupied cubicle to mark my choices with one of those tied-down black Flair pens. Then, after finishing, inserting my marked ballot into the optical scanner, where I hope it’s counted.

i-voted-sticker

But, the coup de grâce is when I get the “I VOTED” sticker. That makes the whole thing worthwhile.

Last week, I received my “Sample Ballot” in the mail. The ballot consists of two sides, front and back. First the front…

florida-sample-ballot-front

Okay, pick up your black crayon and follow along with me…

President & Vice President — Trump & Pence (actually like Mike Pence better than Trump).

U.S. Senator — Rubio (at one time last year, I thought Rubio was going to be the GOP nominee – but Rubio tried to be Trump and it just didn’t work).

Representative, Congress, District 1 — Specht (yes, Steven Specht is a Democrat, but I have met him several times – he’s a good, honest guy – unlike his Republican opponent, Matt Gaetz). This spot was once held by Joe Scarborough (1994-2001) of MSNBC “Morning Joe” fame.

State Senator District 1 — there was really no contest here – this spot was being vacated by the aforementioned Republican Matt Gaetz.

State Representative District 2 — Frank White (because he’s GOP…)

Sheriff — Morgan (his third term, but he’s still doing a fine job, in my opinion and I know him).

Tax Collector — Lunsford (since I moved to Florida 30 years ago, we’ve had two tax collectors, so whoever gets it, Lunsford or Moore, will be there a while).

Superintendent of Schools — Malcolm Thomas (third term, I believe – I know him, as well).

Florida Supreme Court Justices — Judicial retention – I always, without fail, vote “NO” on all of these. I don’t like the idea of these guys/gals having their position of the Florida Supreme Court for too long. But, more often than not, all of these justices will be retained.

Flip the Ballot Over…

florida-sample-ballot-reverse

Amendment 1, Solar Energy — NO (backed by all of the big Florida utilities, so who do you think will benefit by this amendment’s passage? CONTROL of solar is what they want).

Amendment 2, Medical Marijuana — YES (I don’t see how pot is any worse than addictive opioid pain medications – plus, “Big Pharma” is running ads against this – narrowly lost last time).

Amendment 3, Tax Exemption Disabled First Responders — YES

Amendment 5, Homestead Exemption… — YES (seasoned citizens need all the help they can get).

That’s it.

Your time is up.

Put down your crayons.

Apply your “I VOTED” sticker to your forehead.

And hope for the best.

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Crisis Point: We Must Survive

The date — this morning
The time — 6-ish AM
The place — kitchen
The person — me

Opened up the Mr. Coffee coffee-maker…

Spent five minutes trying to remove a single coffee filter from the package of 100. Placed one (or maybe two?) filter(s) in the coffee filter basket.

Fumbled with the lid on the blue container of my new favorite cheap coffee — Maxwell House “Morning Boost.” (Seven bucks at Winn-Dixie.) Measured the appropriate amount of ground coffee for the morning’s needs.  One extra scoop for good luck. Grabbed the glass decanter and washed out the previous day’s coffee residue. Added the correct amount of cold water and poured it into Mr. Coffee’s water reservoir. Closed the lid. Pushed the button that says, “Brew. BREW NOW.”

mr-coffee-crisis-point

Lights come on. Pretty lights. Green. Blue.

Wait.

No coffee. No gurgling noise. No drippy noise of precious black coffee bean infused water filling the Mr. Coffee decanter.

The lights are on, but — no coffee.

Crisis Point.

After making several attempts to “will” Mr. Coffee to actually make coffee, I rained blows upon him with ever increasing force, accompanied by curses, with ever increasing crudity. Nothing worked.

Mr. Coffee* just sat there — mocking me with his blue and green lights.

Then, I tried “turning it off and on again.”

Nothing.

6:30-ish…

Crisis Increasing.

Somewhere in the cabinets above Mr. Coffee, there was a device that might — just might

There it is!

Kettle filled with water and placed on the stove. Turn on the TV local morning news — “Four dead in a murder suicide in Okaloosa County…” Hmmph. Probably had no morning coffee—

Kettle whistling.

Opening up Mr. Coffee, I remove the precious ground “Morning Boost” and pour it into the life-saving device on the counter.

My old coffee press.

Briefly I recall my younger days being a Coffee Snob and grinding my own beans and—

Screw all that. Dump that Maxwell House in there, add the boiling water and pop the lid on. Wait four minutes and s-l-o-w-l-y push the press down…

coffee-press
I AM MR. COFFEE.

Crisis Managed.

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*Seriously. This Mr. Coffee coffee maker was less than a year old…

The Queen’s Candidate of Choice

We’ve mentioned The Queen before…

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Since 2011, and because Jocelyn Zichterman got a book deal out of it, The Queen has fancied herself a representative and mouthpiece for college campus sexual assault victims.

As long as the “college” is Bob Jones University — and the “sexual assault victims” are people that she approves of and don’t give her any on-line lip.

Also in 2011, The Queen was a big advocate of having BJU remove pastor Chuck Phelps from their Cooperating Board of Trustees. Dr. Phelps resigned, of his own volition (saying he was a “distraction”), two weeks prior to The Queen’s Red Balloon Protest which occurred on the BJU campus December 12, 2011.

Much like a Tim Kaine rally, only a few people (less than 20) showed up and participated.

The Queen said “Everything changed. Everything” and decided that rather than being a bitter and “miserable wack-o,” she belonged on the cover of Time magazine — as Time‘s “Person of the Year” for 2012 — “The Protester.”

No. I am not kidding…

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It is that level of delusional thinking that brought us here today. You see, The Queen is back to attacking poor ol’ Chuck Phelps — again. Well, now that Elizabeth Vargas has sobered up (again), maybe The Queen will get more face-time on a new “20/20” episode than JZ got. (See the aforementioned book deal.)

Anyway, the Sexual Abuse Candidate of Choice is…

camille-k-lewis-candidate-of-choice

I guess this should not be a surprise. The Queen and Ms. Clinton are on first-name basis with The FBI

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A Familiar Ring…

Let me get this straight…

Over 30 or 40 years we have a multi-millionaire, turned billionaire, businessman, author, celebrity, who, over the course of his life, has encountered many attractive women, some of whom he married and (very) publicly divorced —

BUT

It wasn’t until this same celebrity billionaire turned Republican and garnered the party’s nomination for President that a flurry — no — a gaggle of females, their memories “triggered” (no doubt) by rude words they heard on TV, crawl out of the woodwork and accuse this 70 year-old man of a whole host of inappropriate and unwanted sexually related actions.

Well, sure. That makes perfect sense to me. There is no way anyone would make this stuff up. There are too many details. Too many people. And besides, Hillary Clinton advised us that “Every survivor of sexual assault needs to be heard, believed and supported.”

It’s amazing to me that women have gone from “I am woman hear me roar” (1972) to “I am a victim and need to be pitied and supported.” (2016)

Now the female “roaring” involves defamation, slander and the politics of personal destruction.

But this isn’t the first time I’ve heard this kind of thing.

In December of 2011 and into 2012, certain Bob Jones University faculty and staff were accused of tolerating sexual abuse among the students. Lurid stories popped up, many of them centered around one particular Dean, and they were fueled by both the traditional media and social media. The stories grew and were published on Facebook, read aloud on YouTube and were used tarnish the reputation of good, honest people and to put pressure on BJU to “change.”

Bowing to that pressure, the young and physically weak BJU president, Stephen Jones, invited a Christian anti-abuse organization called G.R.A.C.E. to survey alumni and students and investigate BJU’s conduct over the last 30 to 40 years. After much delay, that “comprehensive report” (300 pages) was released in December of 2014…

And there was nothing. Nothing. As a friend of mine said it “was non-news about a non-event.” That same phrase was even recently used by Camille K. Lewis, the chief proponent of the G.R.A.C.E. “investigation” —

grace-non-event-camille-k-lewis

Prior to the G.R.A.C.E. Report’s eventual release, we were told that the G.R.A.C.E. team of crack investigators had over a thousand “I was Abused at Bob Jones University” forms filled out and that each one had to be heard and investigated.

bju-grace-abuse-form

But — nothing.

Most of us who know Bob Jones University (and its faculty/staff) well knew that this would be the result. There would be no news. No lurid details. No suicides of certain Deans. No unceremonious dismissals. Personally, I made fun of the whole process (mocking with great mockery) — others weren’t quite so gracious as I …

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Although I avoided using the word “psychos,” I knew what was meant. Not one time did I ever encounter or hear of anything remotely resembling “sexual abuse” while at BJU. In fact, my joke about BJU sex abuse is this:

“The only sex abuse at BJU is this: We can’t have any.”

It was during 2013 that my blog then (“The Hidalgo Grain Company“) received the most hate mail (comments), threats and supposed reports to GoDaddy (trying to shut me down), plus, alleged reports to the local cops and the FBI. All because I didn’t believe a word of this BJU sex abuse stuff.

Along the lines of belief, one comment still stands out above all others — and it may explain some of the media reaction to Trump’s accusers. This comment was from a person I don’t know, Rebecca Davis, who, apparently lives near BJU (Greenville, SC) and writes books. This is what she said to me via comments to my blog:

“I’ve seen several statements on this blog post that false stories of abuse have been circulated in order to attack the school. I’m unaware of a single false story, and if it’s false, then there would be no harm in repeating it. If it’s really true, though, and you’re claiming it’s false, it could damage lives to repeat it in a mocking way.” (Feb. 15, 2013 – underline mine)

Check out the underlined section: “… if it’s false, then there would be no harm in repeating it.” This is very much akin to Hillary Clinton’s “Every survivor of sexual assault needs to be heard, believed and supported.”

No. They don’t need to be believed. Anyone can say anything — and have ulterior motives — to destroy a place or a person…

Proof is what convinces.

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No Illusions

Frankly, I have been amazed and puzzled by the so-called “Exit of Evangelicals” — evangelicals that supported Donald Trump and now say they can’t.

Were these evangelicals under the impression that Donald Trump was one of them? Oh, I know Trump has waved the Bible around at some of his campaign stops, but, come on, that’s just political posturing. Donald Trump knows virtually nothing about the Bible. Over the years while growing his businesses, the Bible and its precepts played no role in the “art of the deal.” Trump openly stated that he “never asked for forgiveness,” one of the very basic steps in reconciling oneself before God. It was only when Trump met Jerry Falwell, Jr. at Liberty University that the Bible started to make an appearance, as well as a conga line of Pentecostals and promoters of the Prosperity Gospel, all of which fall under the “evangelical” label.

It was evangelicals that moved Trump to choose Indiana governor Mike Pence as his running mate. One of the jobs assigned to Governor Pence was to carry for Trump the weight of evangelicalism and act as a counter-balance to Trump’s religious ignorance and hedonism. Along with Trump himself, many of us knew there was plenty of dirty laundry (women and language) in Trump’s past. Trump was in Playboy, made appearances on Howard Stern and had (has?) a penchant for younger, attractive females. Weren’t the pageants a clue? The multiple marriages? Hell-looo

In fact, one statement of Trump’s (and my favorite) made during a 2004 Playboy interview well before he ran for President was this:

“If you need Viagra, you’re probably with the wrong girl.”

I still love that one — probably because it’s so very accurate.

My Dad is very Old School Republican. Back in Illinois, he’s active in local politics and, from the beginning, was very much against the thought of Donald Trump as the 2016 GOP Nominee. I remember Dad texting me just before I voted in the Florida Primary:

“Do not vote for Donald T, he’s a bad boy”

My Dad knew then what everyone should’ve known — Trump is “a bad boy.”

The mass exit of evangelicals didn’t truly start until Trump’s hot-mic words hit the media. Even though they (evangelicals) and their kids watch TV shows and movies where these same words and actions are repeatedly said and graphically demonstrated — not only that, but over half (54%) of evangelical pastors have viewed or are addicted to internet porn¹ — hearing Trump’s immature sexual boasting was just too much.

I can see the Religious Knights gathering at the Evangelical Roundtable now…

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“We cannot support a man who says ‘fuck’ and ‘pussy’ — we just can’t!”

This blog is titled “No Illusion” — and I had none when Trump became the 2016 Republican Nominee for President. Trump is a showman. And his rallies are shows. Trump is an entertainer. And he is entertaining. Trump is a salesman. And he is great at pitching and selling. Trump is a native New Yorker. And Trump is blunt. Trump is a successful businessman. And Trump has that kind of “hostile takeover” ego.

But one thing Trump is not.

He’s not an evangelical. He’s not a Christian.² Trump is as Christian as my cat. (My cat may be more Christian, come to think of it.) I never once thought Trump is or was a Christian.

But I wasn’t voting for Head Christian or Jesus Christ, Jr. —

I’m voting anti-Clinton.

“The Clintons are like herpes: Just when you think they’re gone, they show up again.”³

I’ve never voted for a Clinton.

Why start now?

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¹How Many Pastors Are Addicted to Porn? — Another reason for my previous blog “Feigned Outrage” — manufactured outrage over Trump’s open display of sexual braggadocio to salve their own personal guilt.

²My definition of “Christian” is not anyone who is non-Muslim.

³Actor, comedian Tim Allen, Jan., 2016

BLOG BONUS — Evangelical TRIGGER WARNING

Feigned Concern

It was thirteen months ago Hillary Clinton made this statement:

“‘To every survivor of sexual assault…You have the right to be heard. You have the right to be believed. We’re with you.’ — Hillary”

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And, it was just eleven months ago that Hillary Clinton made this statement via Twitter regarding college campus sexual assaults under the snippet of, “It’s not enough to condemn campus sexual assault. We need to end it.”:

“Every survivor of sexual assault needs to be heard, believed and supported.”

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“Heard, believed and supported.”

That means you have to listen to victims allegations, you must believe them and you must support them.

Unless they are accusers of your husband, Bill, whom you, Mrs. Clinton, not only enabled, but stood by and defended while Bill went on to blue dress fame and glory. Instead of being a strong woman, you “stood by your man” and played whack-a-mole with “The Bimbos,” even allowing the process of destroying and tamping down husband Bill’s sexual assault victims to garner a derisive name — “Bimbo Eruptions.”

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That was Hillary’s job, you see. Destroy the victims. Destroy their credibility. Make every effort to destroy their life. They don’t deserve to be “heard, believed and supported,” they deserve the Clinton treatment, a.k.a., total personal destruction.¹

And then Hillary Clinton, The Woman of All Women, who enabled her husband’s predatory behavior, rode her husband’s coat-tails to power and made every effort to destroy sexual assault victims, feigns outrage (amplified by a willing media) at the words of Donald Trump —

“My god! Children may be listening and watching!”

No thought of that back in the late 1990s when the radio and TV routinely talked about “oral sex,” DNA off of a stained blue dress and “I did not have sex with that woman, Miss Lewinsky…”

The outrage at Trump — fake.

The concern for sexual assault victims — fake.

Hillary and her entire campaign smell of fecal matter…

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Even the flies know it.

Nope, Bill “still dicking bimbos”² Clinton is not running for President. But something much worse is…

His Enabler in Chief.

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¹“Can’t we just drone this guy?” — Hillary Clinton referring to Julian Assange of Wikileaks, proposing the idea of killing Assange by military drone to stop Wikileaks.

²as stated by General Colin Powell, thanks to Wikileaks.

Feigned Outrage

Not having grown up around saints, angels and girly-men, the content and nature of Donald Trump’s comments were no surprise to me. In fact, they sounded familiar. The harshest word I would use to describe the comments would be “immature” or “male bravado” — because the last time I heard such talk, my friends and I were much younger and were more interested in impressing each other than grabbing what Donald Trump wanted to grab.

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What really irritates me is the feigned moral outrage at Donald Trump’s comments. This feigned outrage among men is nothing more than a cover for their own personal guilt at having made similar comments about women to their buddies…

And they thank God above that there were no cameras around to record the event for perpetuity.

The disproportionate reactions to Trump’s off-hand remarks remind me of my own “Religious Rules of Life,” Rule #1 which states:

1. A preacher or minister will tell you what his greatest sin, weakness or obsession is; it will be the subject he preaches on most often.

The commonality is this: An irrational overreaction to a proven weakness in another person is usually a sign of the exact same weakness in your own life.

To quote comedian Bill Engvall: “Here’s your sign.”

And, ladies, please, I know for a fact that you all are just as bad when discussing men — and various parts of men. And “objectifying women?” Really? Whole multi-billion dollar industries could not function if it weren’t for attractive and willing females.

So, stop faking it.

Keep your fake “outrage” to yourself.

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BJU: Declining Enrollment

…was predicted — 20 years ago — and should not come as a surprise.

Since 2010, overall, college enrollment is down across the country — not at every school, but nationally, the number of enrolled college students is down. A slowly improving labor market is cited. Students tend to find available work rather than attend school.

According to a CNN survey, two types of colleges/universities showed the biggest declines in enrollment: community colleges and for-profit universities. These types of schools tend to draw from a pool of lower/middle class students. When the labor market improves, income, even a small income, is a bigger draw than a large expense, such as school.

Individual states have made it easy for parents to send their kids to public universities for a fraction of what BJU now costs. Florida’s “Bright Future Scholarship” is one and the reason my kids took advantage of Florida’s institutions of higher learning rather than go to BJU.

For the most part, Bob Jones University fishes in an altogether different pool — and that pool is shrinking, as well. Conservative, fundamental churches, the type that BJU would associate with, seem to be slowly disappearing. For example, back in the mid-1990s, the area where I grew up in central Illinois was home to several “BJU” churches. Now, there are zero. In some cases, even the church itself is gone.*

Among those conservative churches that do remain, some have become “more conservative” and embraced beliefs that are to the right of BJU. Other schools like Pensacola Christian College or Ambassador Bible College, just to name two, appeal to this crowd. They tend to see BJU as drifting to the left toward liberalism. The rule changes at BJU only confirm that perception of a leftward drift. The changes in rules, or “standards,” then become a reason not to attend BJU rather than an enticement for new students.

Bob Jones IV’s prediction, as heard in the above film clip, of a “remnant” of students is eerily spot on. Even his fewer people will believe as we do statement was accurate, although not as Bob Jones IV meant it.

What I’d like to know is…

Was anyone listening?

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*Another reason to Get Out of Greenville.

Get Out of Greenville

…South Carolina.

The exact number escapes me, but almost every state in these United States has a town named “Greenville.” Illinois, where I’m originally from, has a Greenville just off Interstate 70 on the way to St. Louis. Florida, where I have lived for over 30 years has a Greenville off Interstate 10 just past Tallahassee. There’s also a Greenville, Alabama off Interstate 65 on the way to Montgomery.

There’s also a Greenville, North Carolina, which, I have heard, has caused more than a few destination errors, when one intended to be in Greenville, South Carolina.

And that’s the “Greenville” I’m talking about — Greenville, South Carolina.

I have never done this, but this was too good to pass up. Much of this particular post came from this 09/26/2016 blog by Dr. Mark Ward, “WHAT HAPPENS IN GREENVILLE…” — this line especially made me laugh:

This post is not for all readers, just for those who have attended Christian universities in Greenville, South Carolina. Of which there are two. And kind of three. And there are seminaries there. All of which helps make my point.

“And kind of three” — when Dr. Ward, the earner of three degrees at Bob Jones University, says this, I get it. Even though I was neither a ministerial student, nor was I ever engaged in advanced study of scripture, languages and doctrine, I was required to take basic Bible courses taught by men who did understand and teach those advanced courses. For me, this was the late 1970s and early 1980s, and I remember the opinions expressed regarding various religious organizations. So, when I read “kind of three,” it reminded me of being in Bible Doctrines class at BJU…

Dr. Ward writes from a church ministry standpoint. I don’t.

I have lost track of the number of college friends and acquaintances that came to Greenville, SC as a Freshman — and are still there. Decades. Multiple decades. As I have often said, they attended The Fortress of Faith and never left the shadow of their alma mater.

But without blaming any individuals—only God knows—I can’t help but think more of my fellow Christian college graduates should leave that beautiful little gem of a city and scatter out…

Greenville, SC was no “gem of a city” 35 — nearly 40 — years ago when I first discovered it. Downtown was to be avoided — especially at night. Activity was limited to three local malls: McAlister, Haywood and Greenville. In 1980, I had a car at BJU and was able to get away from the city and drive out to Traveler’s Rest and to the mountains beyond. That’s where I learned rock climbing (and falling) and the value of “walks in quiet solitude, the forest and the streams, seeking grace in every step [I took].”

I spent the very hot and dry summer of 1981 in Greenville. It was during that summer I tried to convince myself I wanted to live there or, at least, near Greenville. I enjoyed the mountains, the hiking and the climbing, but—

I hated the city.

Now, I keep hearing how great Greenville is — a “gem of a city.”

Last time I was in Greenville was a decade ago. Still seemed the same to me, only the traffic was worse. Those weekend mountain retreats I used to run to were gone or replaced with state parks. “More people. More scars upon the land.”

As of now, I have no plans to ever go back to Greenville. I don’t miss it in the least and I don’t understand the attraction —

Unless the “attraction” is never leaving the familiar warm glow of religious comfort you acquired while attending college there.

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Witch Switch

Read the following. “What in the World, BJU” (Facebook) is written by Camille K. Lewis. Pay attention to the portions of the post with the red underline…

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Reading this in context, the “they” in “they cast me” means Bob Jones University, the former employer of Camille K. Lewis and her favorite target, whipping boy, scapegoat and source of all evil.

The post could read: “And in time, [BJU] cast me as the great Witch.”

Only, “they” (BJU) didn’t. Bob Jones University has yet to say or do anything similar to labeling Camille K. Lewis as anything other than a graduate and former faculty member. BJU hasn’t “cast” her as anything other than what she admits to: being unhappy with the university and its policies. They certainly haven’t “demonized” her. BJU’s lack of response infuriates Camille Lewis. I think those in-the-know at BJU understand this and remain (wisely) quiet.

And I (me) never called her a “witch” either. That’s right. Look carefully at some of my old stuff. I called her “The Queen” — a label Camille K. Lewis came up with…

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…I only drew her as a comical “witch,” commanding her flying monkeys and acolytes from The Castle of The Disaffected.

To refresh your memory…

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And, of course, the popular “Flying Monkeys” picture…

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These were mine. Bob Jones University had nothing to do with them. BJU wouldn’t. BJU is just too nice. (I sometimes wish Dr. Bob Jones, Jr. was still there, spouting off in chapel and to the media. Would Dr. Bob Jr. embrace the “witch” thing? Don’t know.)

So, remember, BJU did not create the “witch” label. I didn’t either. I may have drawn a witch, but I have always labeled her…

camille-k-lewis-always-queen-of-the-disaffected

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Tearing Down & Building Memorials

Last Sunday marked fifteen years since the 9/11 attacks in which nearly 3000 (2996) people were killed and twice that number injured. It is only fit and proper to remember those who died on that horrible, unforgettable day. In New York City, at Ground Zero, they read the names of those who died. Others display flags. A pastor friend of mine in Illinois places 2996 white crosses on a hillside of his farm, a reminder, he says, of how fragile and short life really is — and he can relate since he is suffering with pancreatic cancer.

At Bob Jones University an on-campus display memorialized those who perished. Twin beams of light represented the fallen towers. Flags and illuminated plaques with names surrounded the twin skyward pointing lamps.

bju-9-11-memorial-sep-2016

A fitting memorial. Who could find fault or disparage it?

Anyone? Anyone? Lewis? Camille K. Lewis?

Oh, yes. Surprise, surprise — The Queen of The Disaffected has found fault…

camille-k-lewis-against-9-11-memorial

Lots of people blamed 9/11 on many things. Dr. Jerry Falwell, founder of Liberty University, said this to Dr. Pat Robertson…

“[T]he pagans and the abortionists and the feminists and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way — all of them who have tried to secularize America. I point the finger in their face and say ‘you helped this happen.'”

“Well, I totally concur,” responded Robertson.

President Obama’s Chicago pastor, Reverend Jeremiah Wright, in 2003 famously blamed the 9/11 attacks on the way the United States treats people of color around the world…

“The [U.S.] government gives them the drugs, builds bigger prisons, passes a three-strike law and then wants us to sing ‘God Bless America.’ No, no, no, God damn America, that’s in the Bible for killing innocent people! God damn America for treating our citizens as less than human. God damn America for as long as she acts like she is God and she is supreme.”

But, I doubt that Camille Lewis would find the “God damn” rhetoric shocking since one her own buddies from The Disaffected took time to orbit BJU during the spring Bible Conference with this slogan attached to the top of his minivan…

camille-k-lewis-god-damn-america-2016

“God damn America” makes Dr. Bob Jones III’s 2001 remarks…

“Surely Lord, we do not deserve your mercy; we deserve your judgment.”

… seem pretty mild in comparison — almost reserved.

Before you think otherwise, The Disaffected are not “anti-memorial.” In fact, some of Camille K. Lewis’ “What in the World, BJU?” devotees believe that BJU has neglected to erect a more important memorial — a memorial so important that it rivals that of 9/11 where we lost nearly 3000 lives…

sharon-hambrick-the-disaffected

How dare BJU memorialize 9/11 before memorializing the non-news/non-event that was the pointless G.R.A.C.E. Report! How dare they!

One of the silliest and laughable recommendations produced in December 2014 (after many delays) by the “G.R.A.C.E. Team” was this…

grace-memorial-bju

As far as anyone can tell, all this “exhaustive” G.R.A.C.E. Report did was demonstrate just how out of touch some of the counselors and disciplinarians were at BJU — if we can believe the report. There was no evidence of sexual abuse — and by that I mean of the kind you hear and read about at other colleges and universities. Just did not happen. Sexual contact at BJU was brushing up against a girl in the library. Don’t laugh. They expelled the guy who did that — and classified it as “sexual assault.”

We’re not done yet…

According to these Wizards of Smart on “What in the World, BJU?,” Bob Jones University’s 9/11 memorial is “grooming its public image.” That word “grooming” was used on purpose. Why? Because, apparently, that’s what sexual predators do…

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…and it goes on and on. Basically, BJU’s 9/11 memorial is a cover for “grooming,” for promoting trust and isolation, so BJU can once again prey on the helpless individuals that yearly choose to enroll.

You want a G.R.A.C.E. memorial, Camille K. Lewis?

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I apologize for the lack of sheet-metal.

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Prime Suspect: Cartoon Abuse

Special to inktrekker by NETGRACE.INFO —

Gregs Response to Abuse in the Cartoon Environment LOGO

TRIGGER WARNING: Many of you who have suffered or tolerated cartoon abuse in the past may find this blog difficult to process. We urge you to take steps to care for yourself in protective ways, seek support and only read this blog in a place of safety like a) at your local police station, b) or with a friendly FBI agent, c) or with an unlicensed attorney and, most importantly, d) with the encouragement of a faithful companion that we caring individuals at NETGRACE.INFO call a “Reading Buddy.”

Daily Hydrant GRACE Report

It’s tragic but cartoon abuse continues. Our latest case of cartoon molestation comes via Twitter.

1. The Act of Abuse — see the following (please re-read Trigger Warning!)

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2. Recognizing Abuse —

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3. Talk About Abuse — we’re doing that now. Look it in the face. Don’t be afraid (re-read Trigger Warning).

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4. Prevent Abuse — encourage those who can’t draw and come up with their own original ideas, as well as those who cannot properly use Photoshop, Illustrator or CorelDRAW, to stop — Stop. The. Abuse. And seek help before they suffer a psychotic break or are issued a restraining order.

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5. Read our G.R.A.C.E. Retort — see our findings below:

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Special thanks to all of the folks at inktrekker for allowing us to highlight cartoon abuse. You can always find more information here at our website:

www.netgrace.info

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Hard to Swallow

INTERNET, UNITED STATES — The internet was abuzz with chatter regarding the two mysterious green globs that Democrat Presidential Candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton managed to expel before making another failed attempt at talking during a campaign event in Cleveland, Ohio.

Hillary Clinton Hard to Swallow

“I’m allergic to Trump,” Clinton managed to croak. The Democrat audience dutifully responded with laughter and applause. After coughing, and coughing — and more coughing, a Clinton aide jumps toward the lectern and hands the still hacking Hillary what appears to be a cough drop. Ricola? Halls? Ludens?

But the bulk of speculation was about those two green globules that managed to escape Clinton’s mouth. Gum? Throat lozenges? Mucus (“loogies”)? Post-nasal drip? Dentures?

“I’ve see thousands of exorcisms,” said famous exorcist Bob Larson, “And many times, the devil reluctantly leaves a human body during a fit of coughing and gagging accompanied by the extrusion of greenish ectoplasmic ooze. That’s clearly what happened to Hillary Clinton.”

Most medical doctors disagreed with Larson’s supernatural diagnosis.

Unnamed sources close to the Clinton camp claimed that the high degree of airborne Truth Spores were responsible for the nearly debilitating coughing fit.

“I don’t know if you’ve checked the count lately,” said the anonymous Clinton aide, “But, with all of the emails released by Wikileaks and Russia, plus the promise of a Watergate-type investigation into the Clinton emails and Clinton Foundation pay-to-play, the Truth Count has risen to a level that Mrs. Clinton just can’t tolerate. Her allergies kick in.”

Renowned allergist Dr. Delmo Kiltsapp agrees and states that,”Truth allergies are some of the hardest to medicate and treat. Normally we recommend an EpiPen injection to stop the anaphylactic reaction.”

When asked why an EpiPen was not provided to Mrs. Clinton, a Clinton spokesperson replied that Mrs. Clinton’s “Obama Care” Health plan would not pay for it.

“We had to settle for the cough drops we picked up at CVS.”

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BJU & Focus Brands Cook Up a Partnership

For Bob Jones University grads of the last century, used to creamed eggs (chicken abortions), Welsh rarebit (which may or may not have contained actual rabbits), and rainbow-hued ham slices (what was that stuff?!), the scene would be considered surreal —

And too good to be true.

In the latest effort to increase enrollment, Bob Jones University has made some changes to the old Dixon-McKenzie Dining Common.

And we’re not talking about removing planters and a new paint job.

focus-food-brands-bju-dining-common.

As you enter the Dining Common, or “DC”*, as it is known among the students, you are greeted by a sign for McAlister’s Deli, and, just to the left of the deli, an arrow points the way to Moe’s Southwest Grill, should you feel like some “Tex-Mex” before class. (I’m sure your classmates will appreciate the extra helping of refried beans you had…) At the other end of the DC’s huge interior, there’s a sign for Schlotzsky’s—

Ahh – what’s that smell?!

There’s a CINNABON!!

We asked the BJU spokesperson where the Auntie Anne’s and Carvel’s were located.

“Food trucks,” replied the unnamed BJU spokesperson as we walked under a covered walkway. “We have food trucks along East and West Drive. You did see Fudgie the Whale waving as you drove in, didn’t you? We usually have him out along Wade Hampton to welcome students and visitors. Beats the old “gate house,” doesn’t it?” The spokesperson laughed and continued, “I think we put a Bruins shirt on Fudgie just to give him that ‘BJU student’ look.”

Recently, current BJU president, Steve Pettit, talked about the “3000” —

“No, not enrollment goals,” our BJU spokesperson corrected as he gulped down the last of a Caramel Pecanbon, “calories. He was referring to calories. Feel like a Oreo Carvelanche? Ice Cream truck dead ahead…”

Rick Altizer BJU

In a seemingly unrelated story, Focus Brands Inc. has named Rick Altizer (above), BJU graduate and current member of the BJU Associate Board of Trustees, as president of its McAlister’s Deli division. This hiring of Mr. Altizer was confirmed by an anonymous Focus Brands Inc company spokesperson.

Mr. Altizer did not return our calls for comment, but did email us free coupons good for any McAlister’s Deli sandwich (hot, grilled, club or classic). What? No Cinnabon coupons?!

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*Not to be confused with DC as in “Discipline Committee.”

 

 

BJU Bruins Suffer Unexpected Defeat

Pensacola, Florida — What was supposed to be another easy win for the Bob Jones University Bruins Sword Drill Team, turned into an unexpected and agonizing defeat after losing their final pre-season sword drill to another conservative Christian school, Pensacola Christian College.

“I guess we got overconfident,” said an unnamed BJU Bruins spokesperson. “We were undefeated up until this point and the university had just been named third most affordable university for 2017 — I guess that went to our head. ‘Pride before a fall’ and all that.”

Pensacola Christian College, which was named third most adorable college for 2017, was not expected to win against the dominant BJU team. But, by using one of the oldest tricks in the history of sword drills, the PCC Eagles managed to trip up and ultimately defeat their rivals.

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“We knew that BJU no longer exclusively used or taught the King James Version of the Bible,” PCC president, Troy Shoemaker, told our reporter, “so we were pretty sure the old ‘Book of Hezekiah’ trick would work. And it did!”

“I can’t believe we fell for it,” said the BJU Bruins team captain dejectedly, “we are better than that.”

It should be stated that, after watching the jubilant celebration of the PCC Eagles Sword Drill Team, no one in the stadium had the heart to tell them that the Book of Hezekiah is not in the King James Version — or any other version of the Bible.

Just As I Am EXPRESS

The sermon concludes.

The invitation is given.

The congregation sings a muted version of Just As I Am (while silently hoping for just the first and last verse.)

And walking down the aisle seems impossible.

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You need Just As I Am EXPRESS.

Mega-Church Replaces Ushers With Drones

Fort Worth, Texas — The Big McLargeHuge Potential Prosperity Church took a bold step yesterday during their Sunday morning worship service and replaced all ushers with remote controlled drones in the shape of flying crosses.

During the offertory, the assembled congregation seemed unfazed by the intermittent buzzing as the drones swept over them, pausing only to have bills placed into the hovering offering plates.

Church Drones in Mega Church

“It’s time our church embraced twenty-first century technology,” a church spokesperson commented. “It helps us cut personnel costs, plus the drones seem to intimidate— I mean, convict those reluctant to tithe into giving something to make the drone leave them alone.”

This was in response to post-service allegations that a few of the drones seem to “dive bomb” those who failed to acknowledge the passing offering plates.

The company that makes the drones, I’ll Fly Away, Inc., is pleased to see their product debuting in such a large church. A company official stated they were already receiving orders from other mega-churches.

“Won’t be long, ushers will be a thing of the past,” remarked the Big McLargeHuge Potential Prosperity Church spokesperson, “and, let’s just be honest, ushers have always been drones anyway.”

This blog sponsored by:

Church Drone GEaston 2016

BJU Announces Post-Rapture President

Greenville, SC — In an unprecedented show of foresight, and after weeks of intense, sometimes confrontational negotiations, Bob Jones University has negotiated a deal to make former faculty member, Dr. Camille Kaminski Lewis, President of Bob Jones University after The Rapture occurs.

“It seemed like the thing to do,” former BJU president, Dr. Stephen Jones said, “especially after she helped me get the earned doctorate my dad wanted me to get.”

Steve Pettit BJU Plans Post Rapture

“We couldn’t be more pleased,” said current BJU president, Dr. Steve Pettit, after the formal announcement. “We hated to leave the university in the hands of the cinema and business majors. We needed someone with a quasi-scholarly background and, because of our repeated correspondence over the past decade, I immediately thought of Camille Lewis.”

When asked about the deal with BJU, Dr. Lewis quipped, “I’d show you the signed papers, but they’ve already put them in the BJU archives and I don’t have access to them. Just wait,” she continued, “after The Rapture, I’ll be first in line! I’ll open the BJU archives and make them accessible to everyone!”

Details about Dr. Lewis’s future post-Rapture BJU presidency are sparse, but an unnamed BJU spokesperson mentioned that there are instructions for Dr. Lewis to make contact with Buck Williams, Rayford Steele and the rest of The Tribulation Force and work with them. Presently, there is no way to confirm these alleged instructions.

When asked, Dr. Camille Lewis denied there were any “commands” given or dictated to her.

Camille K Lewis BJU Post Rapture President 01

“It will just be nice to finally have all of these ‘fundamentalists’ out of the way,” Dr. Lewis commented. “I can finally make the changes necessary to make BJU a first class institution!”

When asked what those changes may be, Dr. Lewis replied that, “a group of respected, secular scholars would decide.”

“But I will say this,” Dr. Lewis added. “The fish they serve will change. Fish is not square or round. Fish is fish. And, when I become president, it will look and taste like fish.”

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BJU Reclaims the Goatee for God

After viewing photos of faculty and students on the Bob Jones University website, some conservative BJU alumni voiced concern that the growing popularity of facial hair among Christians is just another sign of worldly influence. Some even made comments alluding to the fact that “the rapture” is near.

Goatees BJU

“Did they ban razors at BJ?” one pastor asked.

“Men who don’t shave are just not trustworthy,” said another BJU graduate. “It means they have something to hide.”

“My son will go to PCC¹,” responded one mother of a potential student. “I think they make them shave there.”

An anonymous BJU spokesperson responded to our queries.

“The Devil has claimed the goatee long enough!” our BJU spokesperson said. “We are declaring a reclaiming of — a reclamation of the goatee for God. It’s time we started looking like the Jesus we claim to worship.”

This embracing of male facial hair (female facial hair has never been a widespread problem) by BJU is an abrupt change from the rules of old. Rules appearing in the BJU “Student Handbook” were very clear:

Bob Jones University Hair Regulations 1982

“Back then,” the anonymous BJU spokesperson said, “facial hair was associated with beatniks, hippies and those in rebellion against society and the Lord. Remember, there were a lot of beards at Woodstock! But, that has changed now.”

It could be that “the change” began nearly a decade ago when former BJU president, Dr. Stephen Jones, debuted a naturally grown goatee for a stage role. But, the goatee was fleeting, making occasional appearances, shyly coming and going, doubting and hesitating —

S Jones goatee rules

“The rules were a bit of an issue,” our BJU spokesperson said, “as they always are here at BJU. The ‘Old Guard’ still viewed facial hair as a sign of rebellion, a sign of evil — like The Evil Spock in that episode of the old Star Trek. But we watched Dr. Jones very closely while he had a goatee and detected no significant rise of evil.”

It was that observational “Jones Goatee Data” that was the catalyst for the eventual facial hair rule change.

“And, unlike Lot’s wife, we haven’t looked back!” the BJU spokesman laughed. “Finally — after years of being associated with sin and evil, the goatee is now God’s. And that’s where it’s going to stay.”

When asked if the current BJU president, Dr. Steve Pettit, will grow a “goatee of solidarity,” the BJU spokesperson took a serious tone.

“It is a very serious personal commitment,” he said, “not something to be taken lightly. Growing a goatee will be Dr. Pettit’s decision based on God’s will for his life and that of the university”

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¹PCC = Pensacola Christian College, Pensacola, Florida

SACS: Show Me Yours…

“SACS” is short for “SACSCOC” which is short for “Southern Association of Colleges and Schools Commission on Colleges” — which I puerilely pronounce as “sacks cock.”

So, what does SACSCOC do?

They are the regional accreditation gurus for eleven southern states — South Carolina is one of those states.

Bob Jones University is in South Carolina.

BJU wants accreditation — something they have pooh-poohed (with much pooh-pooh) over the past decades, for fear it will cause spiritual and biblical compromises and have witchcraft taught in the classroom…

…or something like that. I didn’t really pay much attention back then.

Apparently, accreditation doesn’t have the stink of compromise (or sorcery) it once did, so the scholarly types at BJU now think accreditation by (or through) SACSCOC is a splendid idea.

And why not? For years BJU has been hounded, vilified and ridiculed by “those who know better” that degrees from BJU were “worthless” because they lacked accreditation. The quality of your BJU education did not matter. According to The Educational Wizards of Smart and those disgruntled BJU alumni (cf. The Disaffected), the fact that there was no accreditation behind that BJU degree just added to the very long list of reasons to avoid attending The Fortress of Faith in the first place.

Now, BJU appears to be on the verge of accreditation, and those same voices who daily whined and pined that their BJU degrees were worthless — the very same voices are now against BJU accreditation — and would love to stop it.

One Facebook page, written and managed by Camille K. Lewis, is soliciting material — not to help advance BJU accreditation, but with the hopes of hindering it.

WTF-BJU 07-17-2016

Can’t help. Most of my teachers have retired or passed away. It has been 30-plus years, after all. But this next one…

Camille-K-Lewis-WTF-BJU-SACS

Oh, yeah. I still have the letter(s) from BJU telling my parents what a bad boy I was. Here, 30-plus years on, in 2016, the letters are extremely entertaining and are good for a laugh. Seriously doubt if SACSCOC wants to read the lurid and gory details of my expulsion and subsequent ejection and banishment from the Campus à la Jones.

But, maybe SACSCOC would like to read how BJU gave me a second chance? After two years (and a cordial conversation with Jim Berg) I was welcomed back — and finished, walking out with my “worthless degree.”

College is like that. An unequal mixture of Good and Bad. Joy and Pain.

Both combine to give us strength and make us what we are.

Put that in your SACSCOC and smoke it.

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Faith-Healing, Prayer & Car Repair

Does faith-healing and prayer have an effect on auto mechanics? Will “prayer and fasting” extend the life of a Ford Taurus automatic transmission? Will the “laying on of the hands” correct that awful suspension noise in your Chrysler 200? Is it possible that an exorcism will rid your Chevy Malibu of that horrible air conditioner stench? Does praying and promising God anything and everything actually improve your vehicle’s fuel economy when the “low fuel” light comes on and you’re on a dark interstate in the Middle of Nowhere?

It was in the Wall Street Journal, December, 2008, that I read about this Detroit mega-church praying for the entire automotive industry. The sermon was titled, “A Hybrid Hope” — photo below:

A Hybrid Hope Wall Street Journal Dec 2008

At the altar was a Ford Escape (hybrid), a Chrysler Aspen (hybrid) and a Chevrolet Tahoe (hybrid) — all three of these vehicles received the offering of prayer, healing and long life.

Today, none of these vehicles are being manufactured in hybrid form. The Aspen is gone entirely.

Leaving in doubt the efficacy of prayer in the automotive world.

Years before “A Hybrid Hope” was preached in the Motor City, I speculated on the value of faith healing, prayer and auto mechanics…

The Laying on of the Hands Geo Metro GEaston

And praying for the GEO Metro worked.

In 2009, Car & Driver magazine tested a 1998 Metro (now wearing the “Chevrolet” badge) with 110,000 miles on it against a 2010 Toyota Prius and a 2010 Honda Insight — both the new Toyota and Honda were (still are) hybrids touted for their “Save the Planet” fuel economy.

In fuel economy, the Metro beat the Honda Insight and tied the Prius, delivering 42 MPG.

Geo Metro

So, get on Ebay, find an old Metro…

And let the praying begin.

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Churches Sponsoring NASCAR

When I first sketched this cartoon back in 2002, I thought it would be a bit outrageous to have churches sponsor NASCAR race cars. “The First Baptist Dodge.” “The Assembly of God Ford.” “The Cathedral of the Sacred Heart Chevrolet.” And, so on.

Fourteen years later…

Bob Jones University Chevrolet Silverado Pick-up

Okay — technically not a church — or a car. But many times in its storied history, Bob Jones University has acted like a church (and held church on campus) and many of you who own trucks drive them like cars and expect the same level of performance and comfort…

NASCAR and church sponsorship

Is there a “Calvary 500 Sprint” in NASCAR’s future?

Word is the Presbyterian Reformed Toyota is predestined to win.

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BJU: NASCAR Sponsorship to Drive Up Enrollment

“Heavenly father, we thank you tonight for all your blessings, you said in all things give thanks. So we want to thank you tonight for these mighty machines that you brought before us…

Thank you for GM Performance technology and R07 engines. Thank you for Sunoco racing fuel and Goodyear tires that bring performance and power to the track…

Lord, I pray and bless the drivers and use them tonight. May they put on a performance worthy of this great track. In Jesus’ name, Boogity Boogity Boogity, A-MEN!”¹

There it was. Big and blue. Sitting in front of the Dining Common — ironically, sitting almost in the same spot the nightly post-evening meal “Snail Trail” use to begin…

The Bob Jones University Chevrolet Silverado Racing Truck…

NASCAR BJU Truck

NASCAR BJU Silverado Pick-up

NASCAR BJU Bruin Race Truck

Sporting BJU colors and “66” (for the number of books in the Bible), this truck is ready to drive new students to BJU.

“We already have the geeks and nerds for our computer and engineering programs,” commented an anonymous BJU spokesperson. “We got the nerds using Pokémon Go and making the Dining Common a PokéStop. Now, with the BJU Bruin Racing Truck, we’re after the rednecks — the backbone of America.”

With the addition of a BJU racing truck, there had been rumors that the university was preparing to reopen some of its closed trade programs, such as, auto and diesel mechanics. But the spokesperson for the university said those rumors were untrue.

“Those new students we glean from our NASCAR sponsorship will be funneled into our Ministerial Program in the School of Religion,” the BJU spokesperson said. “Loud noises. Crashes. And people going around in circles. They’re a perfect fit!”

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¹A few lines from an actual prayer prior to the start of the Federated Auto Parts 300 NASCAR Nationwide Series race (July 23, 2011 ), offered by Pastor Joe Nelms of the Family Baptist Church, Lebanon, TN.

More on church sponsorship of NASCAR…

BJU Uses Pokémon Go to Lure New Students

(See UPDATE below)

It’s summer, but the campus of Bob Jones University is bustling with activity.

Monday morning, a Squirtle (along with a few Zubats and a Bulbasaur) was spotted in front of the Founder’s Memorial Amphitorium (FMA) — plus, it was discovered that the Dining Common was a designated PokéStop.

Pokemon Go Used At Bob Jones University

“The ‘Lure Module,'” whispered BJU President Steve Pettit, not wanting to disturb near-by Pokémon hunters. “That’s the real trick to this. We can only use it for thirty minutes or so, but it turns our PokéStop into a magnet for creatures — even the rare ones! And where the creatures are,” President Pettit continued, “new students are not far behind.”

In the last few years, BJU has experienced a decline in student enrollment. The combination of higher tuition costs, a flagging economy, increased competition and a shrinking pool of potential students has been difficult to overcome.

But President Pettit is undeterred — and decidedly optimistic.

“Pokémon Go is just another tool the Lord has provided us with,” Dr. Pettit said. “Once the gamers are on campus, we provide them with brochures, tours and good ol’ southern hospitality, in hopes that they will enroll this fall and continue their quest here at Bob Jones University.”

Pettit did later add that BJU is looking for those that “don’t run from a fight” and that “no matter how worthless the beast, they always try to catch it.”

“Now that’s the kind of character we are looking for,” Pettit said.

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UPDATE: bjuedu — Spotted on campus. (For those wondering, can’t be caught with a Poké Ball.)

The Dean of Men: Liverman

“After his release from the military, he entered Bob Jones College in the fall of 1946 which was located at that time in Cleveland, TN. He later moved to Greenville when Bob Jones University moved here where he completed his undergraduate and graduate studies in the School of Religion. At that time, he began his work in the Dean of Men’s office where he remained until his retirement in 1981.” ~ from the William E. Liverman Obituary, Mackey Mortuary, Greenville, SC

Dr. Liverman, Dean Liverman (as I knew him), passed away last week. He was 90 years old. The photo that appeared beside his obituary looked nothing like the Dean that I remembered. But, I have not seen Dr. Liverman since his retirement from Bob Jones University in the summer of 1981 — now 35 years ago.

Deans of Men BJU Liverman Miller 1950 - 2004

I remember Dr. Liverman’s retirement — 1981 was my first time trying double sessions of Summer School at BJU. For the entire time — 8 weeks — there was no Dean of Men. And, for me, no “hair check.” By the end of Second Session, I had quite the ‘fro and zero demerits!

Prior to that, late in the fall of 1980, I had my last disciplinary encounter with Dean Liverman. By “disciplinary encounter,” I mean I was sitting in the Dean of Men’s office waiting for my punishment to be handed down.

This was back when BJU was bursting at the seams. Dorm rooms designed for three were now housing four or five. In 1980-81, I was on the second floor of Reveal (one of five men’s dorms) and there were four of us in one room.

And, late in the fall of 1980, all four of us from Reveal 210 were sitting in the Dean of Men’s — Dr. Liverman’s — office. Why? It happened like this…

Blame it on COBOL. Me and one of my roomies had Dr. Guthrie’s COBOL class. As a Computer Science major/minor, one of our duties was to empty the keypunch machines (this was 1980, remember) of their punches (or “chads”¹) that were stored in plastic containers under the keypunch machines. My roommate and I were emptying the machines and decided that it would be a brilliant idea to collect the punches in a garbage bag and take them back to our room…

And we did. That November evening, the entire BJU campus stock of keypunch chads were in Reveal Room 210.

But not for long.

“White Glove” was a day set aside (Saturday² before Thanksgiving) to give your dorm room a deep cleaning — hence, the name “White Glove.” It was strictly enforced. Failure meant repeating the process until approved. Refusal or delinquency meant demerits. It was a real pain in the ass and ruined a perfectly good Saturday.

Friday night. The night before White Glove. My roommate and I talked the rest of the room (including the APC³) into a little scheme. Pick a room on our hall — any room at random — go in at 2 or 3 AM when everyone is asleep and “T.P.” the room with keypunch chads.

And we did. We picked the room next to the Hall Monitor.⁴ Got up at 3 AM. Entered the room (no locks on the doors). And “made it snow” keypunch chads. We put them everywhere. Beds. Sink. Floor. Closets. Even in the wall-mounted telephone. When we left, that room looked like a “Winter Wonderland.”

Back in our room, all four of us laughed ourselves to sleep.

Next day. White Glove.

In our hall, a crowd had gathered around that one random room. There was a mixture of disgust and laughter that someone could be so cruel (or so awesome!) to do this to another dorm room on the night before White Glove.

“Uh, guys…” I said to my roomies. I pointed to the floor.

A trail of chads led from the sabotaged room, down the hall, straight up to our room door…

They got us. Some of the chads must have leaked out of the bags or stuck to our feet.

We were made to clean up our “Winter Wonderland” — plus, we all had an appointment with the Dean of Men, Dr. William Liverman.

Dr. Liverman sat behind his desk. In the room, two other Dorm Supervisors sat giving me and my three other roommates disapproving looks.

“So, let me get this straight,” Dr. Liverman began. He looked sternly at all of us from behind his black-framed, kidney-shaped glasses. “You set your alarms for 3 AM and all of you willingly got up to participate in this prank.” He looked at my APC. “I would think you would have stopped it.”⁵

Silence for a moment. Then laughter.

Dr. Liverman was laughing.

“All my years,” he said. “Just when I think I’ve seen it all. Something new.” And he laughed some more.

“Of course,” Dr. Liverman said as the laughter died down, “you do realize this is Major Horseplay. You will each receive 25 demerits. You’re fortunate it’s not 50.”

Dr. Liverman, folks.

He lives on.

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¹Made famous by the Florida Bush/Gore 2000 election debacle – remember “hanging chads?”
²There was also a second White Glove the Saturday before spring Bible Conference.
³APC = Assistant Prayer Captain – appointed as the room’s “spiritual leader.”
⁴Hall Monitor = in charge of either east or west hall.
⁵No one in this room was any type of “religion” or Bible major. Two were Accounting. One was Business. I was Cinema.

The Big Rewrite

Saw this on the biased, left-wing weblog The Daily Kos—

“I spoke with former BJU professor Camille Lewis, who knows as much about BJU as anyone.  Lewis spent the first two decades of her adult life at BJU as both a student and a professor…”

The “I” is the unnamed liberal writer and the “Camille Lewis” is our favorite former Bob Jones University faculty member, the de facto Queen of The Disaffected, creator and founder of Do Right BJU, earner of a doctorate amidst the cornfields of Indiana, Ph.D. and independent scholar, Camille K. Lewis.

Lewis, “who knows as much about BJU as anyone” — really? Two decades at BJU and you too can be a BJU Historian. (Dr. John Matzko needs to know this. Dr. Matzko, finally! You can relax! Camille Lewis has got this!)

So, as a historian, a BJU expert appearing in various national media, a self-proclaimed “independent scholar,” a beggar of donated bucks for “travel and research,” how does Camille K. Lewis handle history?

Easy to figure out. Let’s look at her history.

Camille Lewis BJU Review 2006

“I know no other place with such a gathering of genuinely gracious, earnest and intelligent men and women.” Camille Lewis, BJU Review, Spring 2006 (above)

Camille has made a HUGE deal (little Donald Trump lingo there) out of her leaving her teaching position (Rhetoric & Public Address Department Head & Speech Faculty) at BJU and has written and posted repeatedly about her 2007 departure from The Fortress of Faith.

Depending on where you begin to read, Camille Lewis quit BJU — or was forced to resign — or was threatened with termination — or — read on and see what I mean…

Reformed Theology — Mid-2008, memory of 2007 would be reasonably fresh in one’s mind. Camille Lewis comments that she left BJU over “reformed theology” — Calvinism…

Camille Lewis Reformed 05-11-2008

Camille Lewis Reformed 07-28-2008

Roughly the same time period, an entry from the Camille Lewis blog alludes to a difference with BJU regarding God’s working (Christian code for theology) in their lives…

Camille Lewis Blog quote

Notice how this is written. The impression is that, as a couple, they were “expressing how God was working…” And this “expressing” was arousing the ire of their BJU superiors. So, how was this “expressing” being done?

Food Critic — Griping about the food is a big “no-no” at BJU — silly, I know…

Camille Lewis Food Critic DC

“Keswick” refers to more theological differences with BJU. “DC fare” refers to the BJU Dining Common food — specifically the fish…

Camille Lewis Fish 2005

Books — This is quasi-theological, since many of the books Camille Lewis recommended would never be recommended by “the Powers that Be,” i.e., BJU. A February 2008 post from the Camille Lewis blog not too long after the Lewis’s BJU departure…

Camille Lewis Reading Books

Spanking — Another quasi-theological post regarding corporal punishment. BJU teachings are definitely Old School — “spare the rod, spoil the child.” Camille’s viewpoint is decidedly different. And while a member of the BJU faculty, she expressed her opinion that spanking a child is not a “command,” but a suggestion in the book of Proverbs. This occurred in July 2006 on an the internet forum Sharper Iron. In Camille’s blog (2010), she comments about the role these “no spanking” posts had in her leaving BJU…

Camille Lewis on Spanking

Publish or Perish — A very detailed description is given of the Camille Lewis departure in the Kenneth Burke Society Journal, Spring 2008 — again, less than a year after the BJU departure. In this article, Camille Lewis details the saga of “The Last Chapter” — the final chapter in her dissertation that appeared to criticize the theology (theology – again!) of fellow faculty member, Dr. Jim Berg.

“After a long series of meetings and document exchanges, on July 13, 2007, both my husband and I received an ultimatum from President Stephen Jones and Vice-President Gary Weier: ‘If you cannot hold your [theological] position without openly promoting it in spoken or written communication to colleagues, students, or others at a distance from the University, we would have to come to a parting of ways.’

The directive gave us two choices: capitulation or termination. We chose to resign. To be silent would be anti-intellectual and unethical. And what follows here is the chapter that was evidently too threatening to be published while still within the Bob Jones University cloister.”

Some more comments (2010) made on the Camille Lewis blog as to why she left BJU. First one was addressing their struggle with the fact that they would be violating their contract of employment with BJU…

“…we realized that with that ultimatum they had changed our contract. We had complied with every one of their requests — from blog posts about campus food to book recommendations to internet forum participation to dropping accepted chapters from published works. But silencing our conscience was too far. …  And two weeks from the ultimatum, we resigned. God had pushed us out, but He’d given us a very soft place to land.”

The “silencing” was about theology. Reformed theology. Calvinism.

In November 2008, after Dr. Stephen Jones issued an apology for BJU’s past racial policies, in the comments of “Jonesing for an Apology,” Camille Lewis was on-line again, posting in defense of conservative fundamentalists, like those at BJU…

“So I know it’s fun to use these fundamentalists as a punching bag. But it’s not necessary, nor does it bolster your case. They do have a very, very peculiar and separatist reality that does not comport with the rest of the world’s. Believe you me — I know that way better than you all do.”

After a few delays, in April 2011, ABC finally aired “20/20: Shattered Faith” which mentions details of the Tina Anderson case and the role of Chuck Phelps and properly reporting sexual abuse to law enforcement. In that “20/20” episode, we see and hear a few seconds of Camille Lewis, where she mentions that IFB churches are in every town, women are subordinate and men are in charge…

Camille Lewis ABC 20 20

But the Tina Anderson episode of “20/20” was not about Camille Lewis. Camille played a tiny role and only spoke for a few seconds (cumulative). This was Jocelyn Zichterman’s big media break. Camille was a bit player.

But this was the first time since leaving BJU in 2007 that Camille Lewis is associated with anything relating to “sexual abuse” — and none of it associated directly with BJU, but indirectly through a “network” of IFB churches, most of which had some type of an affiliation with Bob Jones University. The resulting outcome of Tina Anderson’s trial highlighted the inept counseling of Dr. Chuck Phelps. From that point on Chuck Phelps was on the Camille Lewis radar.

In November 2011, Camille Lewis discovered that Chuck Phelps was a member of the BJU Cooperating Board of Trustees, prompting the start of a petition, website and Facebook page (“Do Right BJU”) to have Chuck Phelps removed from the Board because of his handling of the Tina Anderson rape case while he was Tina’s pastor. The movement against Phelps used a current BJU senior as a “front man” to push a so-called “student led ‘Wear Red’ protest” on December 12, 2011 to have Phelps removed. That protest did take place…

Camille K Lewis red balloons

But Chuck Phelps had already removed himself from the Board two weeks prior shifting the theme of the protest to remember “victims of sexual abuse.” From the Camille Lewis blog, December 2011…

“We released the balloons slowly. When I released the few that I did, I said the names of the sexual abuse victims I know personally. Like “Jennifer.” And Cathy. And other names still too much in the throes of recovery.”

And at this point, year-end 2011 — four years after leaving BJU — this was when the Camille-based “sexual abuse” bandwagon started to roll. It’s obvious that Camille decided that this the way to get noticed — like Zichterman before her. And it did. I’ve seen Camille Lewis quoted and pictured in The New York Times and the (now defunct) Al Jazeera America news network. (Still no book deal — yet.)

So, after all this time reading about Camille’s theological struggles, “Publish or Perish,” spanking kids and bad fish, you can imagine my surprise when I read The Daily Kos account (June 26, 2016) of why Camille Lewis left Bob Jones University…

The Daily Worker

She left because of “sexual abuse” — in “disgust,” no less.

Right.

Or should I say “Rewrite.”

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•Thanks to those who contributed & granted permission. You know who you are.

Prophecy

For years, the European Union (EU) has been the first sign of the future One World Government, led by the Antichrist of your choice.

Except — no one saw Brexit — and what could be the end of the EU…

May 21 - Judgment Day

Rapture Billboard - Florida

Rapture tract

Prophecy Conference

Prophecy Conference GEaston 2016

Could it be that — all of these prophets are wrong?

Jack-van-Impe-Zombie-Apocalypse

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Do Right BJU: Winning!

A Bit of History —

It was late October 2011 on the campus of Bob Jones University. The door slammed hard as a current BJU student, Pete¹, returned to his dorm room, humiliated and angered by another “counseling session” with the Dean of Men. Pete, a BJU senior, stood for a moment seething. His eyes caught the familiar rectangle of his laptop —

And that’s when it happened.

An idea.

A Facebook page unlike all other Facebook pages…

Do Right BJU Facebook logo

Do Right BJU…

So, Pete, took his laptop and gave life to his creation. A smile once again spread across his face…

DRBJU Founded - Joined Facebook

At least that’s what we were repeatedly told happened. “I was the sole initiator of DRBJU. Eventually I asked several individuals to help me out…”² Pete told one of the moderators on Sharper Iron, May 10, 2012. Again and again the story was told of the brave and valiant BJU student risking life and limb, creating a Facebook page, the title of which was based on a Dr. Bob Jones, Sr. “chapel saying” — “Do right!” — the implication of the page being that BJU, et al, was not “doing right” and needed correction.

And that correction, that guidance, would come from the BJU students themselves, led entirely by Pete.

In November 2011, when I first heard this story, I knew right away it was total horse shit. This had the stink of Camille K. Lewis and her cadre of malcontents (later known as The Disaffected) all over it.³ And I said so — repeatedly.

Until one evening that same November, the sole creator of Do Right BJU commented on my blog:

DRBJU Facebook - original purpose

Originating from a Greenville (SC) area Starbucks (according to the IP) let me know that this was indeed Pete, the sole creator, the main administrator, of Do Right BJU. In other words, the comment was legit.

What struck me about the comment was the stated purpose of the Do Right BJU page:

1) Get Chuck Phelps off the board
2) Get regional accreditation
3) Get Dr. Bob (3rd) to shut up

Ignore the fact that “abuse” or “sexual abuse” was never mentioned. Just the removal of Dr. Chuck Phelps from the BJU Board of Trustees — which happened a few days (December 2) after this comment was written, Chuck Phelps resigned of his own volition, stating he (Dr. Phelps) had become a “distraction.” This made the whole “12-12-11 Wear Red” on-campus protest quite lame since Phelps was already gone.

But, DRBJU had accomplished Goal #1. Check that off.

And this week…

June 16, 2016 — Bob Jones University was granted regional accreditation candidacy status by the Commission on Colleges of the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools.

DRBJU set to accomplish Goal #2. Check again.

There is no “Jones” as BJU President. And the only noise that Dr. Bob Jones III (now quietly the chancellor) has made was to apologize for saying homosexuals should be stoned…

DRBJU Goal #3 — for the win!

Yet, no one over at Do Right BJU Facebook is touting their success. The page is quiet. Dead.

Pete has moved on, I guess.

But, Pete’s creation — his REAL creation — was those Three Original Goals…

And he achieved them all.

Winning!

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¹Not the student’s real name
²Sharper Iron, May 10, 2012 to SI Moderator James Peet
³More information on the actual creators of DRBJU/Facebook

Gatorphobia

From CBS News…

Disney Closes Beaches

“Disney closes all beaches at Florida Resorts”

Why all beaches? Because of one bad alligator? Seems dangerous, divisive and reactionary. Policy and statements rooted in fear and ignorance.

Most alligators just want to enjoy the water and the warm sun. When they do hunt for food, alligators don’t consider humans to be part of their diet. Rather, alligators prefer smaller animals, killed and eaten in a certain way. Bottom line is this — a majority of alligators are peaceful and seamlessly coexist with all of us.

Some have even found employment at Disney World, providing entertainment at “Splash Mountain”…

Disney Gator

Rather than overreacting in an ignorant, gatorphobic manner, we need to find out what radicalized this particular alligator. What caused this alligator to depart from the peaceful path of coexistence and attack a helpless human being? Was it the environment? Parents?

So, Florida Fish & Wildlife, put away your guns!

Education is what is needed. Not the mindless closing of all beaches. Not more killing.

Let’s stop the hate. Let’s stop Gatorphobia.

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Bilderberg 2016: Deep Truth

“Is that what they teach you in med school now? Find a hole and stick something in it?”
~ Me, to my doctor, after a conversation about a colonoscopy

DATELINE: Dresden, Germany

50OWC GEastion-1

50OWC GEastion-2

50OWC GEastion-3

50OWC GEastion-4

50OWC GEastion-5

Meanwhile, at a medical facility near you…

50OWC GEastion-6

Later…

50OWC GEastion-7

And now you know…

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Chuckles in Chef

Grab your Reading Buddy

Time for another FLASHBACK!

Today, we pause a moment to remember the blog called “Chucklestravels” and its coverage of BJU’s little known (and often ignored) scandal surrounding the (then) newly appointed “Chef Branding Officer.” In order to fully grasp the impact of this relatively unknown BJU scandal, I have attached the following screen-shot from the 2013 “Chuckles” blog…

ChucklesTravels - Chef Branding Officer BJU

Back in 2013, I was still the CEO of The Hidalgo Grain Company (an independent think tank located in southeast central Illinois) and I as CEO, applauded “Chuckles” sniffing out this hidden BJU scandal. So, in the desire to see a fellow blogger succeed and in the spirit of cooperation, The Hidalgo Grain Company posted the following comment to the “Chuckles” blog…

The Hidalgo Grain Company Comment to ChucklesTravels

When last viewed (in 2013), our “Comment was awaiting moderation.”

But our helpful (and sincere) comment never appeared.

What kind of a world do we live in when creamed eggs and Welsh rarebit (which may or may not contain actual rabbits) can silence the truth?

Apparently the writer or writers of “Chucklestravels” has/have been bought off by Bob Jones University in order to keep this second and potentially devastating scandal quiet.

Or, perhaps, the “Chuckles” blog comments are managed by multiple individuals and our helpful feedback was deleted by accident.

Mistakes like that happen…

…when there are too many chiefs in the kitchen.

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Throne Room: Breached!

Recently, claims have been made — and I can’t believe I am even writing this — that a fellow blogger broke into a home (that was on the market) and took pictures of the owner’s bathrooms…

Throne Room Breached

The claims were made by Cathy Harris, a known accuser of Bob Jones University’s former Dean of Students, Dr. Jim Berg (Harris claims Dr. Berg threatened her with a rat trap*) and Harris was the organizer of at least one sparsely attended protest outside the BJU campus and is a co-conspirator with The Disaffected‘s de facto Queen.

Harris makes many fanciful claims — she has a wonderful imagination —

Or DOES she?!

Could it be one of our Secret Camera Ninjas was careless?!

Throne Room Impossible

Your mission: Photos of The Queen’s Throne Room

Throne Room Impossible Camera Ninjas

Throne Room Impossible Camera Ninja One

Throne Room Impossible Camera Ninja Two

Throne Room Impossible Camera Ninja Three

Mission: Complete

Throne Room Breached Warning

You have been warned.

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*According to a Dec. 2014 news story appearing in the Greenville News (but strangely, never mentioned in the comprehensive G.R.A.C.E. Report…)

BJU Discipline Committee “DC” List, 1987

Another FLASHBACK! post —

Obligatory Trigger Warning
Many of you who have suffered through the Discipline Committee may find The DC List difficult to process. We urge you to take steps to care for yourself in protective ways, seek support and only read The DC List in a place of safety (like a Starbucks or a Donald Trump Rally) and with the encouragement of a faithful companion or a “Reading Buddy.”

Discipline Committee, or “D.C.,” was the Bob Jones University way of notifying and (in some cases) allowing a student to contest demerits that were handed out for infractions as small as forgetting to vacuum your dorm room floor to fighting, drinking, going to movies — you know, “The Big Sins”…

Demerits usually were dished out one at a time. Occasionally they came in clusters of 5, 10, 25, 50, 75, etc., depending on the act. A student was allowed 150 demerits per semester. Over that, and you were expelled, or “shipped.” There were warnings along the way. Hitting 50 demerits caused you to receive a warning of impending doom. Get 75 demerits and you were Permanently Campused, or “P.C.’d.” — you could no longer leave the campus grounds. (You will note the “DC List” posted the names of those “PC’d.”)

During my BJU stint, I accumulated well over 300 demerits, having only one semester where I received zero demerits. I was “shipped” well before this list was generated – so don’t look for me.

From nearly 30 years ago, March 31, 1987 —

01 DC List

02 DC List

03 DC List

04 DC List

05 DC List

06 DC List

07 DC List

08 DC List

09 DC List

10 DC List

11 DC List

12 DC List

13 DC List

14 DC List

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Lurching Forward…

Jerry: “Why are we looking back all of the time?”

Joel: “Because when you look back, you know what you’re going to say. That’s why. You know what to say about the past. You don’t know what to say about the future.”*

PigSeer Almost Always Right GEaston 2016

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*Jerry Seinfeld & Joel Hodgson, “A Taste of Hell From on High” Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee

Sigmund’s Slip

Bob Jones University is thirty years in my past. I have no relationship with the university — good or bad (although I was told by a current faculty member that I was considered “friendly”) — my now adult children did not attend BJU (or any private Christian college) and I am not a member of the BJU Alumni Association. I do, however, have friends still there and I value their friendship and respect their commitment to the university and its mission.

It saddens me to see BJU becoming smaller. It was going to happen — the pool of students was shrinking while the tuition ballooned. What is it now? In the $20K range? Other conservative private colleges (such as, Pensacola Christian College) have been siphoning from the same shrinking pool. Unless there’s some dramatic reversal (or a miracle – a literal miracle) — it seems inevitable that the pool will drain dry and, like some other small colleges, the doors will shut.

Which brings me to Sigmund’s Slip (quasi-crossdressing reference there)…

Sigmund Freud Freudian Slip GEaston

Today, I (twice) received an email from the BJU Alumni Association asking for me to host a “BJU Alumni Home Meeting.” That was fine. I don’t mind hearing from my alma mater, but I’m afraid that I’m not much of a “host.” (Check the Dining Commons records — I was terrible!)

But that’s not what caught my eye.

It was a typo in the following email (highlighted in green)…

BJU Alumni Association Email 051816

“We are drawing near our decline.” *

Yes, unfortunately, I believe you may be…

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*I am fairly certain they meant to write “deadline” — but, Sigmund’s Slip…

Career Opportunity! Join the TSA!

As part of the Obama Administration’s “Shovel Ready” Employment Initiative, the United States Department of Genital Security announces career opportunities with the Toilet Security Administration (TSA) as Level One Public Toilet Genital Checkers.

Toilet Security Administration TSA

As a Level One Genital Checker (L1GC), you will be empowered to check the genitals of anyone requesting access to a public toilet and deny access to anyone appearing to be an incompatible user of the public toilet facilities. No previous experience is necessary, but general knowledge of genital location and identification is helpful. Being literate in any language is useful (but not required) as it will be necessary to cross-check names appearing on the “Do Not Go” list generated bi-monthly by United States intelligence services.

The TSA is an Equal Opportunity Employer.* Non-citizens, carnival workers and convicted felons encouraged to apply. Advancement opportunities available after the first hour of employment. Tobacco use prohibited. Health and dental insurance required via enforcement of The Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act (PPACA) of 2010.

Glove up now for an exciting future with the TSA!

Glove Up TSA

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*If accepted as an employee of the TSA, you will be automatically registered to vote as a Democrat in the next election. Proof of United States citizenship not required.

Thou Didst Leave Thy Throne…

…On the Internet.

Uh-oh, rumblings at The Castle of The Disaffected…

Queen of The Disaffected Camille K Lewis Throne Net

An Edict is issued…

I just came across this blog post, and I’m going to have to respectfully request that you delete the photos from your website. Those are my photos that I produced as part of my duties as the realtor who sold the home. They are copyrighted intellectual property … and cannot be legally reproduced without permission. Please remove the photos as soon as possible, but no later than 11:59pm on Sunday, May 8, 2016.

And, yes, the photos of the various Throne Rooms, the “intellectual property,” were removed — or at least recategorized.

You may laugh, but understand — this is what is going on inside The Queen’s head…

bath-sees-1

bath02-tm-ggta

bath-sees-2

bath03-tm-ggta

bath-sees-3

bath01-tm-ggta

Disaffection runs deep. Into the mind it will creep — until all that you say, do, think and post is tainted by pure fantasy.

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bath04-ggat - thrones-logoNOTE: We here at inktrekker would like to think the Greater Greenville Association of Thrones (ggat) for the use of these photos. Also, My Listing Service (MLS – not to be confused with Multiple Listing Service which is something entirely different.)

When you’re in Greenville and you need a throne, think Greater Greenville Association of Thrones!

NOTE #2: Unfamiliar with The Disaffected and their de facto Queen? Click here for more information…

The Dark Secrets of the BJU Ceremonial Mace

Another in our FLASHBACK series…

It has now been a couple of years since the Bob Jones University Ceremonial Mace made its inaugural appearance.

We see The Mace being carried here (see arrow)

Bob Jones University Mace Carried

And a close-up here…

Bob Jones University Mace

The Mace began life as Dr. Bob Jones, Jr.’s walking stick, “made from rare African Blackwood.” And what I thought was Elvish, is actually “a silver inlay of the Ten Commandments in Arabic.” The top portion was constructed by BJU staff artists.

But, as usual, there is some controversy regarding the inlayed symbology – at least among The Disaffected, unemployable “independent scholars” and other ignorant dolts. Most, if not all, know what each of these finely crafted inlaid symbols mean, their origin, their history and why they appear on the BJU Ceremonial Mace.

For example, this weird looking cross (note arrow)

Bob Jones University Mace Cross

That’s right.

Everyone with even a modicum of intelligence knows where this symbol originates (look at the arrow)

He-Man and Masters of the Universe

Let’s have another look at the BJU Ceremonial Mace…

Bob Jones University Mace He-Man Cross

It’s too close to be a mistake!

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NOTE: At the risk of having their well-earned Bob Jones University degree revoked, an anonymous BJU grad sent me this secret iPhone pic of how The Mace is used at secret BJU Board Meetings. To see the photo, you must click here…

Angry Grads: Where Are They Now?

FLASHBACK
Bob Jones University Commencement
May 2012

After watching their newly minted graduates walk across the Founder’s Memorial Amphitorium stage, happy families trickled out into the brilliant South Carolina sunshine to shake hands, take photos, embrace and wish each other well—

But wait —

Up in the Sky

What’s that sad, shrill whine emanating from the sky above?

Angry Grads - DoRight Banner

It’s THE ANGRY GRADS!

The Angry Grads

Truth Seeking Grads of Bob Jones - RED

BJU Survivors-apology

DoRight BJU Facebook - WHITE

LGBT Alumni of BJU BJUnity

Bob-whackers - GREEN

C Petey Peterman - BLUE

Christopher Peterman - BLUE 3

Cathy Harris - ORANGE

Dr Camille K Lewis - RED Balloons

Ah, the memories! The heady days of grabbing the crayons, making a banner and digging up a few shekels to hire a pilot and plane. What fun!

Since May 2012, BJU has held four banner-less commencements…

And The Angry Grads have been a no-show.

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